Im going to share two of the worst things I have ever done to myself.
Number one: I waxed my own eyebrows once except I waxed out the entire arch portion of one eyebrow. Im talking a good half inch totally gone in the middle of my brow line. Yes. You heard me right. On top of it all it took 3 months for it to fill in so I had to pencil it in and face work with a clearly penciled in chunk of my eyebrow.
Number two: I thought I also could handle doing my own bikini wax due to having seen snippets of a bikini waxing video in beauty school. Side note—I had NEVER done anything other then a brow wax before so why I thought I could wax my own bikini I'll never know. A few things went wrong during this “event.” First of my roommate offered to stay home and help me but I was all like “ewww I don't want you up in my lady bits.” So she left. That was my first mistake. When picking out wax I chose the RED colored hard wax opposed to the traditional soft wax that you use a piece of cloth to help pull it off. I chose it because it said best for bikini waxes. I had never used hard wax before. If I recall correctly it was cherry scented too. So that, my friends, was my second mistake- I chose the worst wax ever created to use on yourself. Last but not least my third and most major mistake ever was I smeared that shit all over. Like, Im talking the whole area. I didn't bother to even do a test area. Oh my....... As per the directions I waited for the waxed to harden. Then you are supposed to lift a corner and just rip. What are you talking about?? I couldn't even lift a corner for the pain was so horrible. Extreme panic set in. Im trembling in pain trying to just lift a damn corner. I cant possibly inflict this pain on myself. Im not kidding, I was actually shaking. Now my hands are sweaty and so shaky I cant do anything. So what did I do next??? I got in the shower and grabbed a new razor. Thats right, I actually shaved the wax off layer by layer. You guys..this was awful. It was truly almost as terrifying and traumatizing as the time I got locked/trapped inside a bathroom at the Chrisney ball-field or the time when I was attacked (well, sorta) by a wild turkey.
So why did I write about these things?? They say talking about things helps you heal. Im not ready to talk about my other incidents yet though. Maybe some day...

1 comment:

  1. Hahahahshahaha..Val I almost cried laughing at this post! So funny I can't even handle it!